Mediocre Movies: Fred Claus

Note to self: never make promises. Especially ones that involve a time frame. Sorry for taking so long, but I have been incredibly lazy. Well, there was exams for a while, but for the past month or so I've just been sitting around not doing much. It's been quite enjoyable. So, anyway, you may have noticed that Christmas is coming up. Woohoo!! I love Christmas, and I'm not ashamed of it. Despite how commercial and crazy it has become. I love the food, the tree, the gathering of people to share presents with each other, the presents themselves. And of course, I absolutely adore Christmas movies. Although I do think that some are worse than others. Let's see where this one lies.

Fred Claus (Vince Vaughn) is Santa's (Paul Giamatti) lesser known older brother. Throughout the years, he has become resentful of what his brother has become, and the two siblings have grown apart. When Fred needs to borrow money, he and Santa come up with a deal where Fred will help out with the massive backlog of work at the North Pole then he will give him the money he needs. However, because of the work problems Santa has hired an efficiency expert, Clyde (Kevin Spacey) to help him with the holiday rush. But Clyde seems to have some ulterior motives as to why he is actually there.

Okay, let's get the obvious out of the way first. I don't think Vince Vaughn is a particularly good actor. Mainly because he's been the same character in everything I've seen him in, this included. I also don't really think that he's that funny either. All he does is talk so fast in the hopes that something he says is humorous. And he's the second worst part of this film. The worst part of this film is the atrocious special effects. I'm fairly certain that manipulating an actors face onto a dwarf's body is not the best way to create characters. Couldn't they just get actors that were dwarves to play the elves? No sense is made!

Anyway, back to Vince Vaughn, this isn't the worse thing I've seen in him but it isn't the best. It's just kinda in the middle. But the rest of the cast is pretty good, especially Paul Giamatti as a version of Santa who tries too hard to please everyone. He almost cripples himself to get everything done, and Paul Giamatti expresses the frustration he feels towards the situation that he has found himself in. Kevin Spacey is having fun being slimey and evil, and it's nice to see actors like Miranda Richardson and Trevor Peacock turn up in holiday movies. Though I wish both of them had bigger roles.

The film also has some different ideas that I haven't seen yet in a film surrounding the Christmas mythos, namely the whole 'naughty or nice' thing. It's nice to see a film admit that the world isn't black and white, and that kids behaviour is cannot simply be put into two groups without looking at their reasons or backgrounds. So, that part was interesting. But in terms of actual plot, the rest is very predictable. There's even a love interest in the form of Rachel Weisz. Yes, this film, despite some interesting themes and a good cast, is incredibly mediocre. Though I will say that the second half is so much better than the first half. I found the first half almost unwatchable, it was pure Vince Vaughn insufferability.

So, would I recommend this? Well, if you're doing something else this isn't bad background noise. That's about the best I can say for it. Although, to tell the truth I only wanted to watch because of Kevin Spacey. He's totally worth it, if you skip the rest of the film that he isn't in. Other than that, it's just kinda meh. I'd give it a skip if you like good comedy. Though if you like Vince Vaughn, you'll probably like this.

Yeah, that's about it for this review. I would give a rough estimate of when I'm next going to post, but we all know I'm not going to stick to any schedule. I'm a rebel like that. So, in case I don't write anything else before the end of the year, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and all that jazz. Until next time, readers.

Christmas Movies

Well, the temperature outside is frightening, and inside it's even worse without air-con. The beaches are crowded, everyone to flocking to Adelaide (apparently everyone's relatives live in Adelaide) and we are sweating in this sizzling summerland. Yep, Christmas has arrived down under, and me being me I have to celebrate that fact with a list. Of my favourite (but also some of the best) Christmas movies. These are the films that I dust off every year around this time to get in the mood for the big day itself. And let me tell you, this was hard. I love Christmas movies. I love the way they make you fuzzy and expectant and hopeful, and maybe even a little teary. So, let's begin counting down my favourite (but also some of the best) Christmas movies. 

10. Trading Places

Okay, while not specifically about Christmas, and technically covering the whole of December and even into January rather than just the actual holiday itself. But I still think that this film shares some important lessons that this time of year has to offer. Like accepting and appreciating what you have while you have it. Of course, it gives this lesson in the greediest way possible. And the most hilarious. Even though the end scene still confuses me no matter how many times I watch it, the train scene is one of the funniest things I will ever watch. I guess this kinda proves that greed is ever present, even during Christmas. 

9. The Santa Clause

My dads love for this movie has passed on to me. And ignoring the fact that Tim Allen sorta killed someone (manslaughtered, I guess) this is still an excellent family film, with a fairly simple premise; How does someone become Santa? Tim Allen is excellent as Scott Calvin, evolving from a cynical father who is never there for his son into the jolly fat man himself... who through this transformation will also end up never being there for his son. Huh. Plot holes aside, this is still a fun movie, especially during the middle part of the film when we see how him changing affects his own private life. And for some reason, my family ends up watching it every year. 

8. The Family Stone

So, originally I was going to put the 2006 film The Holiday on here, because even though it's too long for its own good, I still consider it to be underrated, in a frothy and cliched kinda way. But then I watched this film again. And it surprised me with how good it was. Sure, it's a little manipulative with how it tugs at your heartstrings, and there are some cringeworthy moments with Sarah Jessica Parker's character. But at the same time, it's one of those Christmas movies that plays with drama and comedy so well. And it's one of the only movies I watched about a family Christmas gathering that didn't resort to gross-out humour. At the heart of it all, this is about a family trying to adapt to change and learn to grow with it. Plus Diane Keaton is amazing as the mother who tries to hold it all together. In the end, this is a very good, bittsweet family dramedy, that if I'm really honest, even got me a little teary.


7.  White Christmas

 

And now we get to my mums favourite Christmas movie. Again, this was a toss up between this one and Holiday Inn, but White Christmas won for one reason. I love Danny Kaye. I mean, Fred Astaire is awesome, but for my own weird personal preference I'd take the versatile face of Kaye over the tap dancing feet of Astaire any day. This is a really sweet movie, predictable as all hell, but who cares. It was made in the 50s! All musicals were predictable then! Besides the opening with Bing singing the title song to the troops in WW2 is one of the best musical numbers on film. Plus, Vera-Ellen's tiny waist. It is amazingly impossible. 

6. Die Hard

I know there's some debate as to whether or not this is a Christmas movie... but fuck you, it's Die Hard! And anyway, strip away the layers, and this is just about a man trying to be with his family for Christmas. Some bank robbers just get in the way, that's all. Besides, what's more Christmassy than Bruce Willis running around half-naked with a gun.

5. Rare Exports 

Now, this is a little obscure. Most people who put horror films on their lists go for something like Gremlins or Black Christmas. But not me. This 2010 Finnish film gets on my list for essentially being a Christmas movie for those who don't like Christmas. This film is about the 'true' origins of Santa, and it is some scary stuff. When it's not little boys about to be eaten, it's instead an army of elves attacking a lonely outpost. If you haven't seen it, I really recommend you check it out. It will help get rid of any Christmas cheer you may have aquired. 

4. The Nightmare Before Christmas

What really sells this movie for me isn't the fantastic visuals of iconic animation. Nope, what really got me loving this movie was Danny Elfman's singing voice. It is incredible the way he moves from singing to talking in the same bar sometimes. And did I mention how awesome the songs are? To me, this is one of the most perfect kids movies. A little scary in times maybe, but altogether fantastic. Jack Skellington has become the face of Tim Burton (even though he didn't actually direct this), and his quest to make sense of his purpose in life, while Sally will always be one of my favourite heroines. Most notably for actually having a brain amidst a bunch of Halloween obssesed monsters. Did I mention the designs in this are also excellent?

3. The Ref

Okay, so we did my parents favourites, and now this is mine. Yep, even after all my talk of heart-warming nonsense, the Christmas movie I like the most is the incredibly cynical one full of Denis Leary swearing. Why, you may ask. Well, because after all the fluffy stuff that came before, I need something cynical to make it through the holidays. Also, not to mention the awesome cast. I love each of the three leads in their own way, but I do have to say that Kevin Spacey kinda steals this one for me. All actors out there, watch this movie and pay attention to each one of Spacey's reactions. There are flawless! And then there's the supporting cast, which includes Christine Baranski (who gets the best lines in the film!) and Glynis Johns. Yeah, Mary Poppins Glynis Johns. Your childhood might be ruined after seeing her in this.

2. It's a Wonderful Life

So random fact time! This, along with Metropolis, was one of the first DVDs my family bought. That was about 9 or 10 years ago, and even though I've seen this film almost every year since then, it still gets me all teary right at the end. I love Jimmy Stewart, and watching him go through some of the worst things in life is heartbreaking. I really don't know what else to say about this, everyone knows it, and if you don't then you really need to! They don't call this a classic for nothing.

 1. Love Actually

Fuck yes! Not only is this what I consider to be the best Christmas movie, but also one of the best movies ever made on its own. Why is it so good? It might be the excellent cast, the best of the Brits you could say. Naming them all would take a whole page. It might be that Christmas is almost in the background, the main plots are about the characters and the fact that it's Christmas merely dictates some of the situations that they get themselves. It might the way it balances the funny and bittersweet moments so well. It might even simply be that not everyone gets a happy ending, mirroring real life, which is something that it's American counterparts can't seem to do (looking at you, Valentine's Day). It's a bit of all of those. My favourite story? Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman's, especially at the end, when you know that they are still trying to get through everything. The other thing that makes this excellent is that each character gets just enough screentime to tell their story. This really is amazing, and if you haven't seen it, then you are definitely missing out!

So, that's it! Have a Merry Christmas, everyone who celebrates it! Have a happy New Years for 2013! And, well, have a marvellous holiday time! Try to stay in the cool! Until next time, readers.